返回版块

研究区 / 幻想国[翻译基地]

[翻译大赛NO.3]  STAR-BOY AND THE SUN DANCE/星孩和太阳舞

主题 ID
52603
浏览
1362
回复
7
精华
楼主:慕子翔 2010-10-18

STAR-BOY AND THE SUN DANCE
星孩和太阳舞

ONCE long ago, when the Blackfeet Indians dwelt on the Canadian prairies, it happened that a band of the people were camped near the mountains. It was spring-time, and the warm winds blew over the prairies laden with the scent of wild flowers. One hot cloudless night two girls slept in the long prairie grass beside their tents with no covering but the sky. The elder awoke before dawn, and saw the Morning Star just rising. Very beautiful and bright he looked in the clear morning air, with no smoke or dust to hide him. The girl looked long at the Star, and she had strange fancies, and imagined that he was her lover. At last she called her sister and said, "Look at the Morning Star. He is bright and wise. I love only the Morning Star, for he is more beautiful than man."

从前,印第安黑足部落在加拿大草原游牧时,他们中有一伙人把营地安在了山脚,故事就是从这里开始的。那正是春天的时候,阵阵暖风在草原上吹拂,空气中弥漫着野花的香气。一个炎热无云的夜晚里,一对年轻的姐妹睡在帐篷旁高高的草丛中,只有天穹为她们遮挡。姐姐在黎明前醒了过来,看到启明星刚刚升起。在清澈的晨空里,没有了雾气和灰尘的遮挡,他是那么明亮又美丽。这个女孩长久地凝望着那颗星,她有了一种奇异的幻觉,好像启明星就是她的情人。最后,她把妹妹给叫醒说,“看看那颗启明星吧。他明艳又聪慧。我只爱启明星,因为他的美胜过了人类。”

One day in the autumn when the flowers were faded and the grass was yellow with age and the cool winds blew over the prairie and the birds were flying south, as the girl was returning home from a long walk she met a young man on the trail. In his hair was a yellow plume, and in his hand a small shrub with a big spider-web hanging to it. He was very beautiful, and he wore fine clothes of soft skins, and the [13] odour of his dress was that of the sweet-grass and the pine. As the girl drew aside from the trail to pass, he put forth his hand and stopped her. "Stand aside," she said, "and let me pass." But he answered, "I am the Morning Star. One night in spring when the flowers were blooming, I saw you sleeping in the long grass outside your tent, and I loved you. I heard you say you loved only me, and now I have come to ask you to come with me to the sky to the home of my father, the Sun, where we shall live together and you will have no more troubles nor cares. It is the Land of Little People, the Land of the Ever-Young, where all are happy like children, and no one ever grows old." Then the girl remembered the hot cloudless night in the spring-time when she slept in the tall grass, and she knew now that Morning Star was to be her husband.

在一个秋天里,花朵凋零了,草儿也枯黄了,草原上刮起了阵阵凉风,鸟群匆匆地向南方飞去,女孩在一次漫长的散步后沿着一条小路回家,这时她遇到了一个少年。他的头发上插着一根金羽毛,他的手上拿着一株小灌木,灌木上挂着一张巨大的蛛网。他俊美极了,穿着华丽而柔软的皮衣,散发出一股香草和松子的气味。女孩正要和他擦肩而过时,少年却伸出手来将她拦住。“闪开,”女孩说,“让我过去。”但那少年却回答道,“我就是启明星。在那个春天的夜晚,花朵竞相开放时,我看到那帐篷边高高草丛中你沉沉睡去的样子,我便爱上了你。接着我又听到你说你只爱我一人,现在,我来邀请你同我回家,到那天上我父亲——太阳的家里,我们将一起生活,你将不再有忧愁和烦恼。那里是精灵的天堂,是永葆青春的仙境,那里所有人很快乐就像孩童一样,没有谁会变老。”女孩回忆起了那个春天的夜晚,炎热无云,她睡在高高的草丛中,她明白了,启明星就将成为她的丈夫。

And she said, "I must first say good-bye to my father and mother." But Morning Star said, "There must be no leave-taking," and he would not let her go home. He fastened his yellow plume in her hair, and gave her the shrub to hold. He told her to place her feet upon the lowest strand of the spider's web and to hold the uppermost strand in her hands. Then he told her to shut her eyes. After a brief time when he asked her to open her eyes, they were in the sky. They passed on to a large tent. Morning Star said, "This is the home of my father and mother, the Sun and the Moon," and he asked her to enter. As it was day, the Sun [14] was away on his long journey, but the Moon was at home and she welcomed the girl as her son's bride. And the girl lived happy in the Star country with her husband, and she learned many wonderful things. Not far from her home, near the tent of the Spider Man who weaved webs, a large turnip was growing about which she wondered greatly. But the Moon seeing her wonder said, "You may dig any roots that grow in the sky, but I warn you not to dig up the large turnip. If you do, unhappiness will follow you."

她说道,“可我得先向父母告别。”但启明星说,“这可没有假请。”他并不想让女孩回家。启明星把他那根金羽毛别在女孩头发上,又把那株小灌木递给了女孩。他让女孩把脚放在最底部的蛛丝上,用手抓牢最顶端的蛛丝。接着他又让女孩闭上了双眼。片刻之后,她被允许睁开眼时,他们已经来到了天上。他们来到一个巨大的帐篷旁。启明星说,“这就是我父母,太阳和月亮的家,”接着他便邀请女孩进入。这时正是白天,太阳外出了,正在他那长长的旅行之中,而月亮则在家里,她欢迎这个女孩做她的儿媳妇。女孩和她的丈夫在这个星星的国度生活的很快乐,她看到很多很多稀奇古怪的东西。比如离她家不远处,那个织网蜘蛛人的帐篷旁,就长着一个大萝卜,女孩对它就很是好奇。月亮看出她的好奇,对她说,“你可以挖任何长在天上的东西,但我警告你,别挖那个大萝卜。如果你那么做,不幸就会降临在你的身上。”

After a time a son was born to the girl, and everywhere the girl went she carried the child. She called him Star-Boy. She often saw the large turnip near the tent of the Spider Man who weaved webs, but mindful of the Moon's warning, she was afraid to touch it. One day, however, her wonder overcame her, and she decided to see what was underneath the turnip. She tried to pull it up but it stuck fast, and she was unable to move it. Then two large cranes, flying from the east, came to her aid, and catching the turnip with their long bills they moved it from side to side, loosened it, and pulled it up. The girl looked through the hole, and saw the earth far beneath her. It was the same hole through which Morning Star had brought her to the sky. She looked long through the hole, and she saw the camps of her people, the Blackfeet, on the plains far below. What she saw was well known to her. It was summer on the prairies. The men were playing games; the women were tanning skins or [15] gathering berries on the rolling hills. She grew very lonely as she watched, for she wanted to be back on the green prairies with her own people, and when she turned away to go home she was crying bitterly.

过了一些日子,女孩生下了一个儿子来,无论女孩走到哪里,她都要把这个孩子带上。她把他叫做星孩。她常常去看那个长在织网蜘蛛人帐篷旁的大萝卜,但想到月亮的警告,她不敢去碰它。但终于有一天,她的好奇心战胜了恐惧。她觉得,无论如何,都要去看一看萝卜的底下到底是什么东西。女孩试着拔起它,但它生的真牢,她根本就不能动它分毫。这时,有两只从东方飞来的巨鹤来帮她忙,它们用长嘴刁住萝卜向两边摇晃,终于将它给松动了,并将萝卜拔了出来。女孩从萝卜留下的洞眼望去,看到下方远远的正是大地。哦,正是通过这个洞眼,启明星把她带到了天上。女孩通过这洞眼久久地望着,她看到远远的草原上一片片的营地,她的族人,黑足印第安人,就住在那里。这景象她是那样地熟悉。草原的夏天里,男人们在嬉戏玩闹,女人们要么在晒着太阳好让皮肤黝黑发亮,要么就在起起伏伏的群山上采摘浆果。看呀看呀,女孩感到十分地孤寂,她多想回到那青青草原上和她族人在一起游玩。当她转身回家时,她已经痛哭失声了。

When she reached home, Morning Star and his Mother the Moon were waiting for her. Morning Star at once knew from her face what had happened, and he said, "You have pulled up the sacred turnip." When she did not answer, the Moon said, "I warned you not to dig it up, because I love Star-Boy and I do not wish to part with him." It was day, and the Sun was away on his long journey. When he came home in the evening, he asked what was the matter with his daughter for she looked sad and troubled. And the girl answered that she was lonely because she had looked down that day upon her people on the plains. Then the Sun was very angry, and said to Morning Star, "If she has disobeyed, she must go back to her people. She cannot live here." Morning Star and the Moon pleaded with the Sun to let her remain, but the Sun said that it was better that she should go back to the prairies, for she would no longer be happy in the sky.

当女孩到家时,启明星和他妈妈月亮正在等她。从她的脸上的表情,启明星马上就知道发生了什么事,他说,“你拔出了那个神圣的萝卜。”她还没有回答,月亮就说,“我警告过你别去挖那个萝卜,那是因为我爱星孩,并不想和他分开。”这是白天,太阳外出了,正在他那长长的旅行之中。他晚上回家后,问他的女儿,发生什么事了,你看上去那么悲伤和苦恼。女孩回答,她感到孤寂,因为她在白天里看到了草原上她的族人。太阳非常震怒,对启明星说,“她犯了天规,她必须马上回她的娘家,她不能再呆在这里了。”启明星和月亮都哀求太阳让她留下,但太阳说,她最好还是回她的草原,既然她在天上已经不再开心了。

Then Morning Star led the girl to the house of the Spider Man who had weaved the web that had drawn her up to the sky. He placed Star-Boy on her breast, and wrapped around them both a bright robe. Then he bade them farewell, saying, "We will let you down where your people on the [16] plains can see you as you fall." Then the Spider Man with his web let her down as she had come, through the hole in the sky.

启明星把女孩带到蜘蛛人的房子旁,就是这个蜘蛛人织的网把她带到了天上。他把星孩放在她的胸前,为她们俩裹上一件明亮的长袍。然后他向母子俩告别,说道,“我们会让你降落草原时,你的族人正好能发现得到。”蜘蛛人用他的网让她降落,就和她来时一样,穿过那个天上的洞口。

It was a hot still evening in midsummer when the girl returned to her people. Many of the people were outside their tents, and they saw a bright light in the northern sky. They watched it slowly drop until it reached the ground. They thought it was a shooting star. They ran to the place where the bright light fell, and there they found a strange bundle, inside of which were the woman and her child. Her parents knew her, and she returned with them to their home and lived with them. But she was never happy. Often she took Star-Boy to the top of a high hill in the west, where she sat and mourned for her home in the sky. And daily she watched Morning Star rise from the plains. Once she begged him to take her back to the country of the stars, but he answered, "You disobeyed, and therefore I cannot take you back. Your sin is the cause of your sorrow, and it has brought great trouble to you and your people."

女孩返回家乡的时候,正是一个炎热无风的仲夏夜。很多人在帐篷外乘凉,他们看见了一道明亮的白光出现在北面的天空。人们看着它缓缓降落在草坪上,认为那一定是颗流星。他们跑向白光坠落的地方,在那里发现了一个奇怪的包裹,在它里面是一个女人和她的孩子。她的父母认出了她,把她带回家一起住。但她从不开心。她常常带着星孩爬上了西面的高山之顶,坐在那里怅忘着她天上的家。每一天她都要望着启明星从草原上升起。有一次,她祈求他带她回到星星的国度。但他回答道,“你犯了天规,所以我无法把你带回。你的罪孽是你不幸的开始,它已经给你和你的亲人造成了大麻烦。”

So the Star-woman lived alone and unhappy upon the earth because she had disobeyed. After a time she died, and her son, Star-Boy, was left alone. Although born in the home of the Sun, he was very poor. He had little of the world's goods, and but few clothes to wear. He was so timid that he never played with other children, and he lived much by himself. On his face was strange scar which became [17] more marked as he grew older. Because of this and his shy and timid ways, he was laughed at by everybody; other boys stoned him and abused him and called him Scarface.

因为她犯了天规,星妈只能忧伤而孤独活在大地上。不久之后,她就死了,把她的儿子星孩孤零零地留下。尽管星孩出生在太阳的家里,但他现在非常可怜。他只得到这世界很少食物,他也只有很少的衣服可以穿。他很含羞,不敢同其他孩子一起玩,多数时间他都是一个人。他的脸上有一道奇异的疤痕,他越长大这疤痕越明显。因为这道疤痕还有他那胆小害羞的个性,他被每个人所取笑。别的孩子向他扔石头,谩骂他,说他是刀疤脸。

When Star-Boy became a man he loved a girl of his own people. She was very beautiful, and many young men wanted to marry her, but she refused them all. She told Star-Boy that she would not marry him until he removed the strange scar from his face. He was much troubled by this answer, and he talked about it to an old medicine-woman who knew many things. The medicine-woman told him that the scar had been placed on his face by the Sun, and that only the Sun himself could take it off. So he decided to go to the home of the Sun.

星孩终于长大成人了,他爱上了本族的一位姑娘。她非常漂亮,许多少年都想娶她,但她回绝了所有的人。她对星孩说,“如果你把那块奇怪的疤痕从脸上去掉,我就会嫁给你。”因为女孩的回答,星孩非常苦恼。他去请教一位年纪很大的女巫医,她知道很多的东西。女巫医告诉星孩说:“这疤痕是太阳烙在你脸上的,只有太阳自己能把它去掉。”他便决定要去太阳的家里。

He went across the prairies and over the mountains for many days, meeting many dangers and suffering great hardships. At last he came to the Great Water in the West—the Pacific Ocean. For three days and nights he lay on the sand fasting and praying to the Sun God. On the evening of the fourth day he saw a bright trail leading across the water to the west. He ran along this path across the water until he came at last to the home of the Sun, where he hid himself and waited. Early next morning the Sun came out of his tent, ready for his day's journey. He saw Star-Boy, but he did not know him, for Star-Boy had grown since he left the country of the stars. The Sun was angry when he saw a creature from the earth, and calling his wife, the Moon, he [18] said, "We will kill him, for he comes from a good-for-nothing race." But the Moon, being kind, prevented it and saved the boy's life. Then Morning Star, the boy's father, handsome and bright, came from his tent. He recognized his child. And, after the usual fashion in the sky, he brought dried sweet-grass and burned it so that the smoke curled around the boy and cleansed him from the dust of the earth. Then he brought him to his father and mother, the Sun and the Moon, and told them who the boy was. And Star-Boy told his story of his long journey, and of the marriage refusal of the girl he loved because of the scar on his face. And they took pity on him, and promised to help him.

星孩走了很久很久,穿越了茫茫的大草原,翻过了一座座高山,期间遇到很多的危险,遭受了常人难以想象的磨难。最终,他来到了西面的大水——太平洋。接下来的三天三夜里,他紧紧地趴在沙滩上,向太阳神祈愿。第四天的夜里,他终于发现水面上出现了一条明亮的小路直指西天。他沿着小路奔跑,越过了大海,最终到达太阳的家,在那里他藏了起来等待时机。第二天一大早,太阳正要出门开始一日的旅行。他发现了星孩,但他没有认出他来,因为离开了星之国度后,星孩已经长大了。太阳震怒了,因为他看到了一个来自大地上的人类。他叫来他的妻子-月亮,他说道,“我们要杀死他,他来自那个毫无用处的种族。”但月亮是仁慈的,她阻止了太阳的行为,救了星孩一命。星孩的父亲,俊美又明亮的启明星,从他的住处赶来。他认出了他的孩子,鉴于天上的习俗,他点燃了一束干香草,一缕烟气在男孩身上旋绕起来,清除了他身上的大地尘垢。接着启明星把星孩带到他的父亲和母亲——太阳和月亮那里,告诉了他们星孩的身份。星孩讲起了他那漫漫的旅程,还有心爱的姑娘拒绝了他的求婚,只因为他脸上的疤痕。他们很同情星孩的遭遇,答应一定帮他忙。

Star-Boy lived in the home of the Sun and the Moon with Morning Star. Once he went hunting and killed seven large birds which had threatened the life of his father. He gave four of the dead birds to the Sun and three to the Moon. And the Sun, glad to be rid of these pests, resolved to pay him well for his work. As a reward, he took the scar from his face, as the medicine-woman had said. And he made him his messenger to the Blackfeet people on the Canadian plains, and promised that if they would give a festival in his honour once a year, he would heal their sick. The festival was to be known as the Sun Dance. He taught Star-Boy the secrets of the dance and the songs to be used in it, so that he could tell his people. And he gave him two raven feathers to wear, as a sign that he came from the Sun, and a very wonderful [19] robe. And he gave him a magic flute and a wonderful song, with which he could charm the heart of the girl he loved.

星孩便在太阳月亮和启明星的家里住了下来。一次,星孩出去打猎,杀死了七只大鸟,它们曾经差点杀死他父亲。他把其中的四只献给太阳,另外三只献给月亮。太阳很高兴清理了这些恶禽,决定好好回报一下星孩。作为回报的一种,他把星孩脸上的疤痕去除了,正如女巫医所说的那样。他让星孩作为他的信使回到加拿大草原上的黑足部落里,承诺如果他们每年能以他的名义举办一次节庆,他就为他们祛除疾病。这个节日现在我们知道叫做太阳舞,太阳告诉了星孩节日中所要用到的舞蹈和歌曲的秘密,并让他转告给族人。他为星孩头上插上两根金乌鸦的羽毛,那可以表明他来自太阳,还为星孩身上披上了一件非常神奇的长袍。最后,他给了星孩一支魔笛并教他吹会了一首美妙异常的曲子,好让他来猎取心爱的姑娘的芳心。

So Star-Boy returned to his people, the Blackfeet of the plains, running along by the Milky Way, the short, bright path to the earth. When he had taught them the secret of the Sun Dance, he married the girl he loved, and the Sun took them back to live with him in the sky. And he made him bright and beautiful, just like his father Morning Star, and gave him work to do. Sometimes the father and son can be seen together in the sky; the people of earth sometimes call the father Venus, and the son Jupiter, but Indians call them Morning Star and Little Morning Star. And since that time, once a year, the Blackfeet of the plains hold the Sun Dance that their sick may all be healed, as it was promised to Star-Boy by the Sun God in the old days.

星孩又沿着那条快捷的明亮乳白色小路跑回去,回到了他的族人——草原上的黑足人那里。他把太阳舞的秘密交给了族人后,和他心爱的女孩结婚了,太阳把他们带回了天上同他一起居住。他把星孩变得明艳又俊美,就像他的父亲启明星一样,并派发了他的工作。有时候,这对父子会被看到同时出现在天空;大地上的人们有时会叫父亲维纳斯【金星】,儿子朱庇特【木星】,但印第安人却叫他们启明星和小启明星。从此以后,黑足部落每年都会举行一次太阳舞,之后他们的疾病便会痊愈,就像久远之前太阳神向星孩所保证的那样。

#2 正在看牡丹 2010-10-18

"he is more beautiful than man",man是指人类,不是指众人
“她们中的姐姐”太拗口了,何不直接把前面的“两个女孩”改成“一对姐妹”?

#3 囡囡妈 2010-10-18

启明星把他那根金羽毛系牢在头发上,又把那株小灌木递给女孩拿。他让女孩坐在蛛网里,
——有误。羽毛给女孩别上。女孩没有坐在蛛网里。

做美黑
——?有这词啊?

启明星把女孩带到蜘蛛人的房子旁,他织的网曾把她带到天上
——哪个他?

#4 琪琪爸爸 2010-10-19

Star-Boy ==> 星孩,我觉得有点生硬...
楼主抱歉哦,我又来挑刺了。 ;P
先挑这一个,等有时间详读了再挑别的。

#5 慕子翔 2010-10-19

我的理解也是人类,所以没翻成其它少年、男人之类的,众人我本意指芸芸众生的意思,但好像确实容易引起歧义。还不如直接说人类好。
一对姐妹这我也考虑过,但觉得那样没表现出年龄感来~~就没采用,不知道有没有两全其美的方法呀~~

#6 慕子翔 2010-10-19

启明星把他那根金羽毛系牢在头发上,又把那株小灌木递给女孩拿。他让女孩坐在蛛网里,
——有误。羽毛给女孩别上。女孩没有坐在蛛网里。
这个自己想当然了~~不好意思~~
你说是不是挂在上面提上去的~~
还有小灌木是不是送给女孩的定情信物呀,是不是可以翻成具体的某种灌木呢~~比如玫瑰~~

做美黑
——?有这词啊?
美黑还真有这词,前几年我在上海街头就看过种广告~~
这是百度来的
美黑百科名片
   美黑美黑就是让皮肤变黑变漂亮,随着中国的日益强大,人们的生活更丰富多彩,一直流行欧美的古铜皮肤,小麦皮肤,逐渐在中国流行,用特殊的化妆品和在日光浴下的照射,可以让皮肤呈现亮丽的古铜色,美丽已经不是一白遮三丑的时代,黝黑健康的肤色已经到来

不过实在是太新了,还是应该直接说“好让皮肤变黑变漂亮”

启明星把女孩带到蜘蛛人的房子旁,他织的网曾把她带到天上
——哪个他?
这个疏漏了~多谢指正~~

#7 慕子翔 2010-10-19

引用:
引用第3楼琪琪爸爸于2010-10-19 10:31发表的  :
Star-Boy ==> 星孩,我觉得有点生硬...
楼主抱歉哦,我又来挑刺了。 ;P
先挑这一个,等有时间详读了再挑别的。
我曾考虑过改为星娃,但觉得人家后来长大了叫娃不太好就没改。
而且星孩是早有的词,王尔德有一篇童话就叫(星孩),我很喜欢的。
翻这篇文章也是因为看到Star-Boy,想到那篇童话,就决定翻了。
说实话,翻到中间时我不太喜欢这个故事,曾经不想翻了,但想到已经做了那么多工作量了,放弃可惜。
还是翻译完了算了。不过翻完了看看还可以吧。就是没想象中的好~·

#8 小梅仙子 2011-01-02

第一次听印第安传说捏表情占位:s:134