贾可的鸡
原著：Milos Macourek
翻译：annamim
译者言：原著确是大手笔，我很难译出原文趣味，只差不多画了个样子。原文附后，请有兴趣的朋友一起译吧。
根据大家的意见，已作修改……
一只鸡就是一只鸡，大家都知道鸡长什么样，毫无疑问。现在来画一只鸡，老师告诉孩子们。所有的孩子都把注意力转向蜡笔，开始画鸡，用黑色或棕色蜡笔，涂上黑色或棕色，可你没注意吧，来看贾可，他的画动用了盒子里的每只蜡笔，还向罗拉借了几支。贾可的鸡最终是桔黄脑袋，蓝翅膀，红大腿，老师说那是只古怪的鸡，孩子们你们怎么看，老师随后说的话，让孩子们笑作一团。老师说，看来贾可开了小差，老师说，老实讲，贾可的鸡看上去更像一只火鸡，不，等一下，像一只孔雀，大得像鹌鹑，可又瘦得像燕子，一只奇怪的小母鸡，至少可以这样形容。贾可的鸡得了一个F，没能挂到墙上，却被移送到老师橱柜里最上层一堆劣等品中间。这只可怜的小鸡，感情受了伤害，在老师橱柜的最上层可没有什么好乐的，所以，决定不再当鸡，它飞出了打开的窗子。
然而一只鸡就是一只鸡，鸡飞不了多远，所以停在邻居家那满是白樱桃和灰醋栗的园子里。这个园子十分漂亮，光荣地昭示着护理者对它的珍爱。你可以看见，园丁，也就是卡朋教授，一个公认的权威，鸟类学家，已经写了七本有关鸟类的书，现在正要完成他的第八本。做最后的改动时，他突然感到疲倦，所以走到院子里干些轻活，并且掷掷蹄铁什么的，这些轻松容易的活动能让他更浸入对鸟的沉思。此处有许许多多鸟，这么多鸟，卡朋自言自语，可惜哪一只都不是他发现的。他感到不悦，飞出蹄铁，心里温情地梦想着一只从无人知晓的鸟儿，眼光便落到一只鸡身上，它正在啄食着小蓝醋栗，珍贵的蓝醋栗，该死，那可不是喂鸡的。那情形让谁都会血液沸腾，教授生气了，怒火冲天，他显然无法射杀这只鸡，所以最后抓住它，把它投掷出篱栅，鸡飞开了。瞧，教授跟着，他飞奔着追出篱栅，紧紧攥住它，把它带回家。一只独特的鸡，那是只，可以打赌没人见过的鸡，桔黄脑袋，蓝翅膀，红大腿，教授赶紧记下来，看上去更像一只火鸡，但不很像，让我想起麻雀可是也让我想起孔雀，大得像鹌鹑，瘦得像燕子，一只奇怪的小母鸡。把这一切写入他的第八本书后，这位教授，浑身颤抖着，以自己的名字命名这只鸡，将它带到动物园。
一只鸡就是一只鸡，谁会操心一只鸡呢，你这样想。但这只鸡准定值得费心，因为整个动物园喧闹起来，这种稀有品种也许二十年才有一次，如若有那么频繁的话。动物园的头儿正搓着手，管理员们在筑一个笼子，画家忙得不可开交，头儿说笼子一定要亮眼，床铺要柔软，他还说，那里已加上一块标牌，卡朋鸡，加利纳•加波里，听上去很可爱，不是吗，你们怎么看，听起来实在是……怎么说呢。这只鸡从没有这么快活，它因备受关心感动得流泪了。妙极了，它成为动物园最吸引人的动物，注意力的中心。动物园从没有过这么多游客，收银员说，游客队伍每分钟都在扩大，等一下，看，那是我们的老师，正带着全班学生站在笼子面前，解释说，刚才你们看到了普里沃斯基马，这里又有个独一无二的物种，叫做卡朋鸡或者加里那•加波里，看上去就像一只火鸡，但又不太像，有点像麻雀，也有点像孔雀，像鹌鹑那么大，可又像燕子那么瘦，哎呀，看那个漂亮的桔黄色头，蓝翅膀，红色大腿，孩子们兴奋起来，他们赞叹说，多么漂亮的鸡 ，一点也没错，老师。但是罗拉，好像被闪电击中一样，拉住老师的袖子说，那是贾可的鸡，我打赌就是的。老师厌烦起来，这个傻孩子的想法太古怪了，胡扯什么贾可的鸡。不过顺着想一下，贾可在什么地方，他又开小差了，你们没注意吧，在那儿，看看他，他就在那里，就在食蚁兽的笼子前面，看着食蚁兽，而他本该看着卡朋鸡的。贾可，老师用尽力气大声地吼，下次你得待在家里，贾可，我太生气了，谁也不会见怪，因为遇到这种事，谁都会血液沸腾。
Jacob's Chicken
by: Milos Macourek
A chicken is a chicken, you all know how a chicken looks, sure you do, so go ahead and draw a chicken the teacher tells the children, and all the kids suck on crayons and then draw chickens, coloring them black or brown, with black or brown crayons, but wouldn't you know it, look at Jacob, he draws a chicken with every crayon in the box, then borrows some from Laura, and Jacob's chicken ends up with an orange head, blue wings and red thighs and the teacher says that's some bizarre chicken, what do you say children, and the kids roll with laughter while the teacher goes on, saying, that's all because Jacob wasn't paying attention, and, to tell the truth, Jacob's chicken really looks more like a turkey, no wait, a peacock, it's as big as a quail and as lean as a swallow, a peculiar pullet, to say the least, Jacob earns an F for it and the chicken, instead of being hung on the wall, migrates to a pile of misfits on top of the teacher's cabinet, the poor chicken's feelings are hurt, nothing makes it happy about being on top of a teacher's cabinet, so, deciding not to be chicken, it flies off through the open window.
But a chicken is a chicken, a chicken won't fly too far, hence it ends up next door in a garden full of white cherries and powder-blue currants, a splendid garden that proudly shows its cultivator's love, you see, the gardener, Professor Kapon, a recognized authority, he is an ornithologist who has written seven books on birds and right now is finishing his eighth, and as he puts the last touches to it, he suddenly feels weary, so he goes out to do some light gardening and toss a few horseshoes, which is easy and lets him muse over birds, there are tons of them, so many birds, Professor Kapon says to himself, but there isn't a single bird that he discovered, he feels down, flips a horseshoe and dreams a love-filled dream about an as-yet-unknown bird when his eye falls on the chicken picking the baby-blue currants, the rare blue currants, that darn it,
he didn't grow for chicken feed, now that would make anyone's blood boil, the professor is incensed, he is furious, he seems unable to zap the chicken, so in the end he just catches it, flings it over the fence, the chicken flies off, and voila, Professor Kapon follows, he flies over the fence in pursuit of the chicken, grabs it and carries it home, quite an unusual chicken, that one, bet nobody has seen one quite like it, an orange head, blue wings and red thighs, the professor jots it all down, looks like a turkey, but then not quite, reminds one of a sparrow but also of a peacock, it's as big as a quail and as lean as a swallow, and after he has written it all down for his eighth book, the professor, all quivers, bestows upon the chicken his own name and carries it to the zoo.
A chicken is a chicken, who would fuss over a chicken, you think, but this one must be well worth the bother for the whole zoo is in an uproar, such rarity turns up perhaps once in twenty years, if that often, the zoo director is rubbing his hands, the employees are building a cage, the painter has his hands full and the director says the cage must sparkle and make the bed soft, he adds, and already there appears a nameplate, Kapon's chicken, Gallina Kaponi, it sounds lovely, doesn't it, what do you say, it sounds, actually. . .how about it, the chicken is having the time of its life, it's moved to tears by all this care, it really can't complain, it has become the zoo's main attraction, the center of attention, the zoo has never had so many visitors, says the cashier, and the crowds are growing larger by the minute, wait, look, there is our teacher with the whole class standing in front of the cage,
explaining, a while ago you saw the Przewalkski horse and here you have another unique specimen, the so-called Kapon's chicken or Gallina Kaponi that looks some-what like a turkey but not quite, resembles a sparrow and also a peacock, it's as big as a quail and as lean as a swallow, why, look at that gorgeous orange head, the blue wings, the scarlet thighs, the children are agog, they sigh, what a beautiful chicken, ain't that right, teacher, but Laura, as if struck by lightning, pulls on teacher's sleeve and says, that's Jacob's chicken, I bet you it is, the teacher becomes irked, this silly child's ridiculous notions, what Jacob's chicken is she prattling on about and, come to think of it, where is Jacob anyhow, again he is not paying attention, now wouldn't you know, there, just look at him, there he is, in front of an anteater's cage, watching an anteater when he is supposed to be looking at Kapon's chicken, Jacob, the teacher yells at the top of her lungs in a high-pitched voice, next time you'll stay home, Jacob, I've had enough aggravation, which shouldn't surprise anyone, for something like that would make anybody's blood boil.